Tying shoes is a no-brainer for adults, but for children it's often a challenge. It requires focus, precision, coordination, patience, and motor memory. It's no wonder some children don't learn this skill until they're 7 years old. Wondering? How to teach a child to tie their shoes? How to transform discouragement, tears, and frustration into a sense of satisfaction and joy? Here are some proven methods.
Learning to tie your shoes – where to start?
Before you start working together learning to tie shoes, check if your child is ready for this step. Can they:
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stringing beads,
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button up
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distinguish between left and right sides,
and – most importantly – whether he or she wants to try. Some children start learning to lace as early as 4-5 years old, others only in kindergarten. It's worth considering the child's readiness, not age. If your little one doesn't take the initiative, you can suggest it, for example, in this way: "I see you want to do things on your own more and more often. Do you want me to show you how to do it?" how to tie shoelaces?” Such a pressure-free invitation strengthens motivation and a sense of agency.
Before you start practicing tying your shoes, pause for a moment. calming games for children They will bring calm, relieve tension, and help your little one focus. This will make hand movements more precise and make it easier to remember subsequent steps.
How to teach a child to tie shoelaces?
It's best to start with large, comfortable props. Before you reach for your real shoes, prepare:
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cardboard shoe – cut out a shoe shape from cardboard and make holes in it, and let your little one paint it as beautifully as they can.
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thick string or ribbon (more comfortable for little fingers) in contrasting colors, which will make it easier to remember the movements.
Your task will be to slowly demonstrate and name each movement you perform.
We know from experience that learning through play works wonders, so you can use the rhyme:
„"„"How to Tie Your Shoelaces" – Monika Niewielska
I take the laces in my hands,
I check if they are tight.
First I cleverly cross them,
then I tie it tightly.
Now I'm squeezing hard.
I make a loop with one end,
with the other end I do the second one
– I have long rabbit ears.
Then I cross these ears,
I intertwine and hold.
I pull both ears slightly
and the bow is ready
How to teach a child to lace their shoes? Learning through everyday experiences.
It's worth it lacing shoes become part of daily rituals. A child remembers movements more quickly when they practice them regularly, in short sessions. A good idea is to:
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having a competition "who can tie it faster,"
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exercise on plush toys,
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creating colorful bows for decoration.
In this way tying shoelaces – learning through play becomes a natural part of the day, not an unpleasant duty.
Learning to tie your shoes – how long will it take?
Some children learn to tie their shoes in a few days, while others need much longer to build motor skills. The best thing we can do as adults is to be patient with our children and trust their pace.
Instead of saying, "Wrong, it worked again," say, "I see you're trying again. This is how we learn!" Such messages build motivation and confidence.
Golden rules for a parent teaching a child to tie their shoes:
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Breathe easy. It's just laces—really.
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Don't rush. Loops like peace, not rush.
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Show them and let them try. Children need to touch, not just look.
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Turn learning into fun. A poem, a rhyme, a story about a rabbit – it works!
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Praise them for their effort. Because the most beautiful bows are those you make yourself.
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Don't compare. Every child has their own learning rhythm and pace.
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Don't rush to correct. It's better to say, "See how I do it" than "Wrong!"
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Exercise when you have time and are in a good mood. The morning before preschool isn't the best time.
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Trust the process. Each attempt is a step closer to independence.
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Rejoice with your child. Because that little knot really is a big deal!
Tying your shoes is more than just learning a practical skill—it's a symbol of growing up and self-confidence. So when you finally hear, "Mom, Dad, I tied them myself!" Pause for a moment. Smile, hug, and say, "I see. I'm proud of you." Because it's in moments like these that a child's agency, self-esteem, motivation to learn new things… and love grow.
AUTHOR:
Joanna Goc-Matyskiel
teacher, Positive Discipline educator, TUS and critical thinking trainer
